Winson-Talk

Winson is a useless SHIT

I hate people slam the phone. Had a huge argument with my dad. He called today and ended up he slam down the phone. The moment he slam the phone, my heart broken into pieces. This is the second time he did that in my entire life. I was 18 the first time he slam the phone. I was on my way back to kuantan and i saw two friends. We planed to have dinner together when we reached kuantan. But he insisted that he wanted to fetch me from the bus station back home. This time i said i wanted to drive down to KL since the highway is open. He insisted me to take the bus or flight. Sometimes i wonder why would he want to make a fuss of me driving down to kl ?? It is just a small matter and he create a huge issue out of it. We ended up with a very serious argument. I wonder why ended up i decided to give in? That is what makes me hate my self so much. Arghh … Why cant i persis on my own stand ?? why didnt i lie to him that i am taking bus down but instead i will be driving down ?? He really makes me feel as thou i am useless. Giving in really makes me think that way. A man who is turning 22 soon who does not have his own stand. He knows my weekness very well. He is 4000 miles away and yet he is still able to control me and my mind. I started having doubt on my self when i come out to work in the future. Will I easily get controlled by people ?? I know what he did is for my own safety. But i reckon he is over protective. I may be safe, but it wont do me any better when i come out to the real world. Went 3rd uncle house for dinner. Havent been driving like crazy fella for very long time already. I remembered the last time i did that was when i was in coll that time after finishing my exam. I tot i gonna failed. So i drove like a mad fella to release all my stress. After dinner, speed all the way up to TC and had tembikai susu. After having tembikai susu, i still dont feel any better. Drove up to pantai sepat and make a U turn from there. I feel as thou i wanted to kill my self in an accident. Nah.. i dont want to kill my self. I just wanted to hurt my self only. Being painful physically is much more better than having the pain in the heart. Stop by at TAJ for roti kaya and milo tarik. Decided to go back since i feel very tired already. Yesterday wound also havent recover yet. Today is like putting salt onto the wound. Really hurts alot. who can i turn to, to cry ?? I am a man. But seriously, i cant take all this at the same time. It is killing me. Winson is breaking down.

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